Caught |
O Lord,
Bend my hands and cut them off, for I have often struck You with a wayward will when these fingers should embrace You by faith.
I am not yet weaned from all created glory, honor, wisdom, and esteem of others for I have a secret motive to eye my name in all I do.
Let me not only speak the word sin, but see the thing itself.
Give me to view a discovered sinfulness, to know that though my sins are crucified they are never wholly mortified.
Hatred, malice, ill-will, vain-glory that hungers for and hunts after man’s approval and applause, all are crucified, forgiven, BUT they rise again in my sinful heart.
O my crucified but never wholly mortified sinfulness!
O my life-long damage and daily shame!
O my indwelling and besetting sins!
O the tormenting slavery of a sinful heart!
Destroy, O God the Dark Guest within me whose hidden presence makes my life a hell.
Yet You have not left me here without grace; The cross still stands and meets my needs in the deepest straits of the soul.
The memory of my great sins, my many temptations, my falls, bring afresh into my mind the remembrance of Your great help, Your support from heaven, Your great grace that saved such a wretch as me.
There is no treasure so wonderful as that continuous experience of Your grace toward me which alone can subdue the risings of sin within:
GIVE ME MORE OF IT.
-from "Valley of Vision, a collection of Puritan Prayers"